Spoke 'n Word

New Year's Resolutions

by Stephen Herrick

Since its January, I thought it would be good to come up with a few club resolutions for the New Year. If you have any you would like to add, just email them to me at stephen.herrick@athenian.org, and I’ll try to update the list from time to time. Meanwhile, here are a few suggestions to choose from.

On this, the first of January, 2006, I resolve:

To spend more time with my non-cycling spouse/partner/family members. At least 30 minutes every Saturday, and no less than an hour on Sundays.

To not feel like I have to chase down everything that passes me, especially the cars.

To mow my lawn once in a while. Who knows, I might even find my mountain bike that way.

To remember that the next time someone tells me they crashed, I will first ask them how they are, and then I can ask how is their bike and which components will they be upgrading to.

To clean my bike at least once a week, instead of three times per week as I do now.

To stop storing my bike in the living room, and to put back the couch that I moved out so I would have room for the bike.

To consider that a discussion of the connection between hydration and urine color might not be the best topic at an office party.

To donate one of the extra bicycles which I no longer use to charity, as soon as I can upgrade my carbon Calfee to a titanium Moots.

To finally break down and buy a new pair of shorts so the rider behind me doesn’t have to witness that which should really be private.

To be fully geared up, clipped in, and ready to ride before Don squeezes the whale.

To actually buy a set of crutches instead of renting them all the time.

To diversify my exercise routine to include something other than road cycling. Now where did I leave my mountain bike?

To lose weight by eating less ice cream, instead of upgrading to titanium components.

To stop the use of any stimulants or drugs to enhance my riding abilities, except for caffeine, endurolytes, Gatorade, Heed, Revenge, Cytomax, Red Bull, simple sugars, complex sugars, refined sugars, coarse sugars, brown sugars, fruit sugars, vitamins, minerals, dietary supplements, carbonation, carbohydrates, carbon fiber, acai, glucosamine, aspirin, Motrin, Tylenol, “Pep”-to Bismol, or anything else over the counter that anyone tells me might remotely help.

To finally beat Mark Abele up North Gate Road to the junction, even if I have to start the ride at 4pm to do it. (Okay, so what’s a list of New Year’s Resolutions without at least one impossible-to-reach goal?)

Happy New Year everyone.